It’s Mother’s Day morning, and I’m heading out for a bike ride -- by myself. I’ve left the predictable and affectionate warmth of my home and husband for something less certain. I’m not exactly sure of my route or how long I will bike, and it’s not at all clear the level of effort it will require.
Solitary endeavors are usually like that. Without the input and need to accommodate a companion, I am free to traverse my physical and emotional world without negotiation. It’s liberating, enlightening, and freeing.
I’m sure the Myers Briggs personality test folks could peg me immediately. I’m someone who thrives on time alone. I love my running and biking buddies, and active group pursuits are my favorite way to socialize. But exercising outdoors by myself is when I feel most renewed. My mind is free from distraction while I experience the comforting backdrop of measured breathing, physical effort, and outdoor sensory input.
I’ve solved more personal and legal work problems than I can count while exercising. I don’t even have to consciously focus on an issue; the possible solutions just gently appear and probe, are tested and analyzed, and then mysteriously retreat until suddenly I’m aware of how to solve the problem. At other times, my mind just bumps along from one subject to the next like a tumbleweed in a gentle breeze. I am grateful during either scenario to have unfettered time when I don’t need to channel, contain, or direct my thoughts.
Time alone is therapeutic, as well. I am reminded that I am capable, resourceful, creative, and strong. I’m not at the bidding of clients, and I’m released from any social niceties that casual, but essential, relationships mandate. The emotional needs of loved ones (whether real or imagined) are non-existent. Instead, exercise pushes me head-first into self-discovery to confront and slay my personal dragons. There’s nowhere to hide while exercising alone.
Today’s bike ride lasts almost two hours, and afterwards I feel uplifted and happily fatigued. I throw my bike into the car, and I drive to my son and daughter-in-law’s house for a family barbecue. Delicious food, lovable and energetic dogs, and the joyful engagement with those I love the most is the perfect accompaniment to a quiet, reflective, and solitary morning.